Wednesday, July 9, 2008

5 Things I Hate, Part 1: Jeffe Edition - Avatars In Auto Assault, or Terrible Last Minute Additions to Games

This was the worst last-minute addition to an MMO ever. I wish I could find video of them in action, but since Auto Assault has the dubious distinction of being the fastest mainstream MMO to ever be put out of its misery, very little footage exists. The animation was just terrible, movement was awful, the whole thing was barely even tested, and in my opinion should have just been left out. Vehicle-only games are just fine with me. I swear to sweet holy Jesus on a tree branch, if anyone ever makes a large robot-style MMO... if some terribly animated human or alien ever hops out of the robot to take a stroll around town, I'm going to give myself a Peruvian necktie.

Here's what they looked like. Beautiful, no? Notice the great lighting. Notice the awesome neon glow on the armor. The rebreather. The amazing textures. The map arrow in his head. It's all too beautiful to be true, really.

Note to developers: most MMOers have played a game or two that involve moving characters around a screen. We're not stupid. For most of us, the first thing we do is test the jump, and if it doesn't exist, or is crappy... well, that could be the end of things right there.

Flying Lab gets an honorary mention for deciding to cram avatars and avatar missions and combat in before release. Ugh.

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